Friday, May 14, 2004

Late night with mental office girl

Excuse me but I've just had a triple latte, I've just finished f'ing with our purchasing' dept.'s shitty webtool... how can you take SAP applications and f' them up? Give them to purchasing.

My dear friend bought me the Bad Girls calendar for Christmas and while I do appreciate some of the humor and I did receive a few good suggestions for sick-day excuses (i.e. My toilet is backed up and it's flooded my aparment, I had some bad oysters last night, my car was towed and I don't know why?!) I do run across some ridiculous advice. For example 4/27 gave a tip on how to give a good interview.

Basically it's suggested that you approach the job interview like a late-night talk show appearance.

First, I think this technique would seriously freak out most of the managers in this organization... as they aren't too keen on extroverted behavior here. Also, that flirty-flirt action you see going on with Hollywood starlets and the late-night hosts... that wouldn't fly here either. I could flash my bra at these people and they wouldn't have a clue how to react. I mean they can't even respond to you (make eye contact and a verbal utterance) when you try to ask them (nicely) what floor they'd like to go to on the elevator. "Look, you spineless jackass, I didn't ask you to marry me. I asked you what floor you wanted to go to!"

There are days when I wish I had a giant can of Raid.

A few late-night appearances I would not like to emulate during an interview:

- Sandra Berhardt on Letterman
- Harvey Pekar on Letterman
- I can't come up with any more because I actually don't enjoy watching most late-night shows... maybe Conan if I'm in the mood.

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