Saturday, April 16, 2005

God Save the Queens

I mean it! Was looking up info on the Domestic Diva, Brini Maxwell when I found the New York City Girls on the Queen Mother site. And suddenly I became lost in the world of glamor and razor sharp cat-clawed wit. I can't stop... love the names.... Flotilla Debarge, Miss Ming Vauze, Miss Understood...Hedda Lettuce. I did appreciate Hedda's "Do's and Don't's at a Drag Show."

A sample:
2. Don't sing along with the drag queens song unless you want a 6-inch platform heel thrown between your bloodshot eyes. If you do continue to sing even though a Prada shoe is lodged in your cranium be warned you will be brought up on stage and forced to enter a big dick contest. Which you will loose. Pity does not work in a big dick contest and the blood coming from your forehead, though performance art like is a bit out of place. Snap!

I remember once in San Francisco this girl and I were smoking on the steps of her aparment building when a 6 foot 4 beauty made her way up the steep incline of the hill in four inch heels, and a smart denim miniskirt. "Goddamnit," she said as she took a long drag, "I hate it when they have better fucking legs than I do." Drag queens, the celebrated and best, possess a uppity grace that I can only aspire to mimick in it's weakest form.

I was listening to an Interview with Dolly Parton on NPR (I think) and I think she said, "I'm glad I was born a woman... if I wasn't, hell, I'd probably be a drag queen." Dolly said how when she was a little girl, she remembered seeing a woman who was 'all done up' with all the make up, red lipstick and the short skirt and remembering how much she admired her appearance, despite the fact that her horrified mother insisted that the woman was nothing but "trash." Dolly Parton, of course said one of my all-time favorite quotes: "It takes a lot of money to look cheap."


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